I Wasn’t Ready for This (But I’m Showing Up Anyway)
For a long time, I felt like I had to disappear to survive.
When I quietly stepped away from YouTube the first time, it wasn’t planned. I didn’t leave with a strategy or a cute sign-off. I left because I was tired.
Mentally, emotionally, and physically. I hit a wall, and this time, it wasn’t one I could hustle my way around.
At the time, I didn’t have the words to describe what I was experiencing. I just knew something felt off. My routines were breaking down. My creativity was gone. I couldn’t manage my finances, my emotions, or my goals. I was stuck in a cycle of burnout and avoidance that felt impossible to escape.
Eventually, I was diagnosed with bipolar 1. As painful and confusing as that was, it gave me a starting point. It helped me name what I was going through instead of assuming I was failing at life.
That was the moment I realized I didn’t just need rest. I needed a reset.
I Haven’t Just Been Resting. I’ve Been Rebuilding.
Since stepping away, I’ve been doing the quiet work of rebuilding. Not just my content. My actual life.
I started asking better questions.
What do I really want?
What pace feels sustainable for me?
What would it look like to build a life that doesn’t depend on perfection?
I started paying attention to how I spend, how I speak to myself, and how I show up. I let go of what no longer fit. I gave myself permission to start again, even though I didn’t feel ready.
Because if I waited until I felt fully ready, I would never begin.
What to Expect from Me Now
I’m not coming back with perfect systems or all the answers. But I am coming back with clarity, self-trust, and a clear mission:
To help women reset their finances, wellness, and purpose one meaningful step at a time.
This space and YouTube are for the women who are starting over, not because they failed, but because they want something more honest.
Here’s what you’ll find in my content:
Conversations about money that include mindset, habits, and hope
Wellness support that goes deeper than just what’s on your plate
Business guidance for women creating something of their own
Encouragement for anyone who feels behind, stuck, or unsure
Free Tools to Support Your Reset
If you’re looking for a fresh start, here are some resources I created to help:
Affirmation Guide: Speak truth over your mindset, money, and purpose with affirmations and guided prompts.
Eat More Plants: A Beginner’s Guide: A gentle way to begin eating more plant-based meals without pressure.
Start Your Business for $50 or Less: A guide for women with big ideas and small budgets.
Money, Mood, and Avoidance: A mini-guide to help you shift your emotional spending patterns and take your power back.
The Truth About Starting Over at 43
I am 43 years old. I have no savings, and I’m $20,000 in debt. I am still figuring it out.
But this time, I am not trying to prove anything. I am not chasing hustle.
I am building a life that feels like mine.
If you are tired of living on autopilot…
If you’ve been quiet about your struggles…
If you’ve been waiting to feel ready before you take a step forward…
This is your permission to stop waiting.
Start with what you have. Start with who you are.
